Cock-a-doodle doo

This weekend was a strange one. At various stages of Saturday both Tottenham and Hereford were bottom of their respective leagues, yet the overriding feeling is one of success. Hereford put their terrible start behind them with a much needed three points at home to Crewe. Two well taken goals have given the Bulls a welcome confidence boost that lifted them two places but still in the relegation zone. Spurs also got off the mark with a hard fought point at Stamford Bridge. The Spurs showed great resolve and we seem to have put the Chelsea hoodoo behind us. I liked the way we closed out the game with authority – composed on the ball and never really in danger of losing it. From a Welsh point of view it was great to see Bale and Gunter starting. I also loved Gomes, after Robbo it’s great to have a keeper who comes for crosses and his tip over from Lampards chip would have been a a goal last season. I don’t want to tempt fate but the days of panic and self-destruction against the big boys seems to be a thing of the past. Ramos’ cool disposition is rubbing off on the squad. Just watching Villa against Liverpool, there’s nothing there to be scared of but with Spurs, you never know.

Back In The USSR

Finally some good news. It looks like the we are actually going to buy a centre forward after Spartak Moscow have confirmed that striker Roman Pavlyuchenko is poised to join Tottenham. According to a club spokesman, "A deal has been agreed between the clubs and the transfer may be concluded by Thursday". The 26-year-old is still in Moscow awaiting a visa that will allow him to travel to London to complete the move. The bit I love is the sentence, "Everything has happened very quickly so I could not even say goodbye to my team-mates". Can you see Berbatov giving a shit about saying see-ya to Dawson and Boetang.

Things can only get better - hopefully!

Don't you just love football. All summer longing for the season to start and then when it does you wish it hadn't bothered. Between them, Spurs and Hereford have played 6 and lost all of them. For Spurs is just the usual frustration of not being at the races early enough but for Hereford it's a bit more serious. 6-1 to Bristol Rovers is worrying. That shows a lack of defensive quality and a weakness in mental strength and belief. No team should concede six to a team in their division. Graham Turner is looking for some new signings or loan deals during the next week and Spurs hope to get a replacement for the pathetic Berbatov. Surely he won't claim his wages for last week.

Snap, Crackle and Pop

I was watching the Wales Under 21 team last night against Romania and although we lost we played some great football. At the forefront of the display was Gareth Bale who was immense. He's got a wand of a left foot, he's fast and he gets up and down the flank all day long. It just amazes me that he was on the bench on Saturday. Surely he's got to start against Sunderland. He might be the wierdest looking footballer since Luke Chadwick, but fack me, that can't be why Ramos left him out. Thinking about it, Bale looks like one of the kids on the Rice Krispies packets from years ago. I was pretty impressed by Gunter who looked strong and quick and could be a good buy for us in years to come. He might be a work in progress but Bale is boxed up and ready to go - so pick him Juande, that left foot is like Phil Mickelson's lob wedge.

Wenger's eyes let him down again

You gotta love, sorry, loathe Arseole Venger. He was apparantly quoted in the Times yesterday saying he is surprised by Great Britain's achievements at the Olympic Games. "I didn't know the English were good at swimming," said the skinny guy with the turtle's face. "I have been in this country for 12 years and I haven't seen a swimming pool." I got news for you Arse, we've got thousands of British footballers as well, but you don't seem to see many of them either. Then again he's become a standard joke for not seeing things. I'll tell you something he hasn't seen for over three years - silverware! And I reckon iof he'd of pushed Martin Jol any further a couple of years ago he definitely would have seen a swinging right hook from Big Mart.

Tell me why, I don't like Saturday's

Looking on the bright side, I see we moved up two places on Sunday! It was on the cards that we'd lose to Boro, we're always shit away from home. Why can't we ever start a season off with a cushy home game against Fulham or Wigan? What really cheeses me off about Saturday was the bench - I don't care that it was made of plastic not a more environmentally friendly wood, it was the people sat on it. If Berbatov is sub because of his attitude, just sell him and let's get on with it. Then there's Ledley King, if we're resting him at this stage of the season, God help us. We're not playing for a week, surely he could recover in that time. Sat next to Ledders is Gareth Bale. He probably would have been our player of the year last season if he hadn't picked up an injury, but now he can't get in in place of Esso-Ekotu or whatever he's called, who had a mare. Come on Oneday, get your best players on the park and let's win a few games before another season falls away before October. On top of the Tottenham debacle, there's Hereford who have played two and are yet to get a point. I knew this was going to be a struggle, I just wish we could have kept Wayne Brown - we would have picked up three points at Orient with him between the sticks. A bit early to panic but the alarm bells are being tested and the batteries are fine.

Let's Get Ready To Rumble

It's almost here, the season that has taken forever to come around, has finally come around - well, in a few days. Like the shop down the road doing a neat line in Betamax video players, we haven't sold anyone for ages - well since Kaboul went to Pompey two days ago. Do you think they should play the Pompey/Sunderland game at White Hart Lane, it'd make a tidy reunion for about a dozen players. Personally I'm just waiting for the moody Bugger, sorry, Bulgarian, to join Fergie so we can have a bit of time to line up a replacement. Arshavin seems to have gone quite and Roman Pavlyuchenko could be deep in Georgia for all the news that move now generates. You know when you're Christmas shopping on the 24th and it's 5:25, you'll basically buy anything to tick the "it's the thought that counts" box? Well I just hope we don't go into that desperate mode and buy bloody Emile Heskey or Dirk Kuyyt. Anyway, three days to go and if we can continue the pre-season form we can bury the Boro, sign the next Gilzean and take it from there.

Back down memory Lane

When I was growing up, my dad used to take me to Tottenham at least once a season and we used to go to away games in the Midlands which were only an hour or two away. As I got older I was playing football every weekend so didn’t go to the Lane for about twenty years, except for a Screen Sport Washing-Up Liquid Data Matrix Super Duper Cup semi-final 1st Leg against Everton in 1986. Then on the 13th March, 2004 I went back. I was banging on about it for weeks before hand and was like a dog with two dicks the day of the game. I went with the Jones Boys, Bill and Phil and my cousins husband Glynn from Presteigne. It’s about a six hour journey one way from my house but boy is it worth it. Walking from the car to the ground has a wonderful feeling – you’re full of anticipation, excitement and you end up giggling at just about anything, the way guys do that women just don’t get. I can remember seeing the cockerel on the High Road and the turtle heading starting. After a couple of hours shopping in the numerous club shops and a few beers it was game time. Walking into the ground and seeing the field of dreams takes your breath away. It looks so perfect. The stadium looks brilliant and the pitch is like the proverbial bowling green – "if you can’t play on that boys you can’t play on anything." How many times I heard that over the years – the thing is, it’s bloody perfect for the opposition as well. The most notable change over the years is the big screen presentations before the game which are handy for showing the team news but on the downside they stop the build-up of the crowd. The announcer only shuts up ten seconds before kick-off. so there’s no time for the crowd to get singing and getting all hyped up. Anyway, we won 1-0 thanks to a Liam O'Brien own goal, in off his nose probably. But the best thing was that Phil and Glynn got to meet their idol – Chirpy. Ah, happy days.

Say Cheese No.3 - League Cup Final 1971

Even before it was called the Carling Cup we knew how to win it. Joe Kinnear, Bill Nick and Alan Mullery enjoy a lap of honour.

It's All Forlan Apart

We’ve all been encouraged to chase our dreams and to go for the top. Set out with great ambitions and you never know – you might reach them, but even if you don’t you can look yourself square in the mirror knowing you gave it a shot. Well, that’s probably what Daniel levy is telling himself as another summer of world-class centre-forward chasing bites the dust. It’s involved two classy Russians and even yesterday there was talk of Spanish sensation David Villa coming to White Hart Lane. Today’s papers are reporting the harsh reality that we might have to settle for the former Man Utd striker who moved to Spain - yeah, Ruud van Nostrelhair I hear you scream, no sorry, Diego Forlan. We need to just hope Darren Bent can somehow transform his pre-season form into the Premiership. Pause for a slight cough.

Sepp Blatter for the LPGA

Less than a minute ago Annika Sörenstam played her last shot a professional golfer. You could have guessed it was going to be a birdie, as inevitable as the last one Jack Nicklaus made. Legends have this knack of doind sometime special at the right time. Neither of them were going to retire on a bogey. I always find it sad when legends retire, they leave a void which doesn't always get filled. Annika's probably got out at the right time because the scene is getting overrun by a bunch of Asian girls that are hungrier than 37 years old Annika possible could be at this time in her life. The sad thing is, all the Asian players look so boring, none f them have that long, elegant swing of Sörenstam. Mind you, in their defence, none of the men have got a swing quite like Annika. Off the courseshe has been the model pro and she was summed up nicely by some guy behind the green who shook her hand and said, "you've been a credit to the game" - amen to that, fella.

From a sexist view point, I'd like to see more of Paula Creamer (how aptly named she is). FIFA President Sepp Blatter once made the wonderful comment that women footballers should play in more revealing kits and be encouraged to pett heavily after scoring a goal. He was slated across the world. Unfairly I thought, because whilst it was the wrong thing for a man in his position to say, he was only saying what 99% of the male population was thinking. Well, I think he should get more involved in golf and start making some changes to the apparel of the LPGA. Miss Creamer looks divine in her little pink number, but have you seen the new gun, Ji Yai Shin - minger. I would hazard a guess that any money she makes will be through winnings not endoresments. See the photo above - that's not her! That is the way Sepp sees golfers - he's not all bad.

As pretty to watch as any Arse.

After watching our friendly against Celtic yesterday and then seeing the Woolwich Wonderers lose to Juventus today I feel good about the coming season. I know you can't judge too much from friendlies, they lack all the drive and purpose of the real thing, but we look like we're starting to keep the ball. We've got ball players all over the park who all seem comfortable in possession and can beat a man. The one thing I admire about Ceth Fibreglass is that he hardly ever gives the ball away. With possession being nine tenths of the law, it's a good trait to have. I think we've got players like that now with Modric and Bale looking particuarly good. The situation with Berbatov is obviously key to how we progress this year. Bent looks lively and whilst he banged a shed load in against Orient and Norwich, we surely need a world class replacement for the sulking Bulgarian if he moves on. Arsenal don't look that much different to us, so why can't we have a crack at the top 4? Anyway, the annual smell of pre-season optimism has filled my lungs again - only two weeks to go until the cold shower of realism and a 1-0 away defeat to Boro.